Sex Games

2014-02-16


It should come as no surprise to frequent readers that I'm the sort of individual who might play games of the... pornographic persuasion, if for no other reason than out of curiosity. That's how my journey down this rabbit hole began.

Let's start by defining what I mean when I use the term 'sex game.' Firstly, I'm definitely not referring to any sort of social activity. Anything that involves other humans is far and away less pathetic than the subject of this series of entries. Neither am I referring to kinky dice, or that 4chan game where you 'roll' to see what you jerk off to.

No sir, the type of sex games I'll be writing about are more like interactive pornography. PC games with explicit representations of sex acts. For the purposes of my reviews, due to my personal tastes, I won't be playing any of those 'interactive graphic novels' or whatever you want to call them. Those are lame. I also won't be reviewing 'adult' text games for the same reasons I don't jerk off to books.

In my search for perverse distractions, I've come across a handful of games that meet my criteria, but unfortunately most of them are pretty crappy. In fact, as far as I can tell, there's only one real name in PC sex gaming, and that's Illusion. They're Japanese (shock, horror) and they're good at what they do. Most everything else I've come across has been too shitty to take seriously, in the context of programs that allow you to watch 3d-animated barbie dolls porking each other.

Getting a hold of these games isn't hard unless you wish to do so legitimately. However, seeing as these games aren't even sold outside of Japan, I don't see the harm in hoisting the Jolly Roger in your pathetic quest for virtual poontang.

This entry will act as a landing page for my myriad sex-game reviews. A word of warning: These entries contain nudie pictures and are focused on subjects which will upset some people and offend quite a few more. If this bothers you, don't read the reviews or play the games.